It was this time last year I packed up my desk and waved a forlorn goodbye to a six-figure salary at a renowned influencer marketing company. Though I knew there would be no turning back after giving the two weeks notice, the hope that I’d made a mark on the industry in some small way lingered. This naïvety led to a rude awakening when, within days of my departure, all mentions or traces of me were scrubbed from my work. For all intents and purposes, I never existed there.
As time passed, the sting of this expunction faded. My soul was charged with new purpose, and I’d learned a hard lesson: We are more disposable than we think. If you want to be remembered, do something that can’t be erased.
Over the past twelve months, I’ve dedicated my time and energy to making a difference in Dallas. It has forced me to shed the safety of my online bubble, get proximate– even uncomfortably, at times, and see the world without a rosy filter. As a consequence to this shift in focus, my blog has arguably suffered. I’ve posted less this year, grown more disconnected from the blogging community, and watched Instagram engagement plummet. I slowly began to accept the decline of my so-called influence. It seemed a small price to pay in exchange for giving back to the community.
Last week, I bore witness as men of all ages, ethnicities, and backgrounds, gave their time to be stand-in father figures for a “Breakfast with Dads” event at a Dr. Billy Earl Dade Middle School in South Dallas. My friend/coworker Kristina posted a request on Facebook hoping for 50 volunteers. More than 500 signed up. It was incredible.
The sight of these compassionate and strong men showing up in full force brought me to tears. I watched as the mentors helped teach the young male students how to tie a tie. Awkward, scared expressions transformed into smiles of confidence and trust. Lives were changed that day. I realized then that true influence cannot be measured in Instagram followers or page views.
2017 has been transformative. I went from shooting New York Fashion Week runway shows to photographing after-school programs at local elementary schools. Instead of coding blogs for former contestants of The Bachelor, I helped develop an online platform for youth to share their creative work and voices.
Sometimes I feel as though I’ve been holding onto my past life in fear of losing my status as an “influencer” online. It’s time to let go and move forward. Reflecting on the year as it comes to a close has led me to this conclusion:
The amount of influence you have is nothing compared to the impact you make.
K. Dove says
This is beautiful my friend. You are now a community activist. Fighting the good fight. By far, working side by side with you this year has been transformational. You have helped me grow in so many ways. You’re the epitome of an influencer. You influence not only the Dallas community but the nation. Through your eyes, you open so many others. We will keep pushing!
Stephanie Drenka says
Thank you, P.I.C. — It’s pretty incredible for me to get to work alongside my hero and role model every day of the week (literally.. it’s like we never take a day off lol). There’s no one else I’d want to be on this crazy ride with. What a year to reflect on… and we already know 2018 is going to top it!
Jaclyn says
This is so moving, Stephanie. I’m struggling with the same. Finding a way to let go of all of this and step away from a negative, and self-absorbed community as an “influencer”. Wanting to focus more on life itself, building better relationships and finding time to give back to those who deserve more attention than Instagram followers.
Love that you’ve found your light and purpose. It’s so incredibly inspiring. ♥️
Stephanie Drenka says
I can’t wait to catch up next week because I miss seeing you every day 🙁 That was by far one of the best parts of work at rS. I’m working on the same things next year–
now that I’m more settled in my new job, it’s time to find that life balance again to reconnect with friends. And if it makes any difference, your photos and outfits are continually my favorite hands-down because you’ve never compromised your personal style and attitude! I love it and you.
Tara says
You are amazing woman! You inspire me in so many ways and have such an admirable heart. <3
Stephanie Drenka says
Happy holidays, Tara! Thank you so much!! I’m so, so glad that you introduced yourself that day at NYX. Love your kind heart and unique style.
Emily Dunn says
Amen Stephanie! Your influencer is greater than you know! You’ve played a big part in my life thus far and seeing your work in the community and how you light up when you talk about volunteering helped me to dedicate more time doing the same. I appreciate you SO much and your are truly an incredible inspiration in more ways than one! You are one of the most beautiful, intelligent, kind, loving, motivated people I know. Thank you for sharing your story with the world and making a positive impact on so many.
We love you!
Em & Barbie
Stephanie Drenka says
Thank you, my favorite foodie sisters!! I’m so excited for what 2018 brings us… starting with the best double maternity shoot ever… and the cutest babies to photograph! Love that blogging has brought me such amazing, lifelong friends.
nico says
Stephanie!!!
Your influence in my life is HUGE and will never go away. You were the seriously the best boss ever!!
love you so much
Stephanie Drenka says
*CRYING* Will always cherish our time working together, sweet Nico. You brought life to my work and kept me motivated in those final months. Can’t wait to catch up with you next week and hear everything you’ve been doing this year!